25.5.11

sheep's bollock: part deux

and the verdict is:

*drumroll*


rumble rumble
rumble
.
.
.
.

meh!

it was ok
texture was very light and the tissue tears easily under your gnashers
it was not disgusting at all
except for the last bites
i think a whole testicle is a lot for one person

it should be shared among a group
a few slices each
as part of a bigger meal

not that it gets worse the more that you eat of it
but its just that i get put off larger quantities of certain foods
for example, i love sashimi
and i love oysters
but i wont eat a dozen pieces
more than four is an overload
same goes for this

the taste is a little bland and not very exceptional
of course my recipe could be improved
but in of itself
a sheep's bollock
has little to contribute to the spectrum of tastes

the texture is what makes it
if anything

i m not saying that it doesn't taste of anything
it does impart on the sense
a generic meat flavor like chicken breast
but then mildly nutty

that was monday night after i wrote part one
tuesday night i bought and fried myself a french 500g t-bone beef steak
it helped wash the ghost psychological taste of bollocks
from my being

and so i leave you with this little gem of foodie wisdom:

t-bone is better than testicle!

23.5.11

a meat called sweet; put to the test: part one

today i purchased my most daring ingredient yet
so daring that i am not yet sure if i have the balls to go through with the undertaking
i've wanted to try this for a while

in barcelona
i had briefly toyed with the idea
the opportunity did not present itself and i did not pursue it further than it needed
mostly because i chickened out
heavily discouraged by the inescapable but considerable dash of instinctive disgust


today while buying lamb back strap and some cans of baba ganoush from the syrian butcher in san gwann
opportunity rang my doorbell

i recently embarked on a long time coming low-carb diet
i needed to stock up on protein foods
what i ended up buying is probably very protein rich
i wondered what else to buy so i inquired further as to the syrian's wares


i pointed to a bag at the back of the display counter
and asked what was in it

he laughed...

circumstance made itself present
was i to grab destiny by its stones?
or should i cower forever?
promise myself a lie disguised as postponement?
...


anything this butcher has recommended
i have gone back for more

first it was the back cut of lamb
a loin perfect for grilling and barbecuing
a princely cut among the red meats

then it was the heart of lamb
simple to cook and ranks only second to certain animal livers among offal

and lastly his homemade lamb meat casseroles and falafel mixes: spot on


i manned up
put my life in his hands
(hands soaked in the bloods he cleaved from many a halal-slaughtered animal)
-give me just one of them
i decided

he reassured me that it was good and easy to prepare
- fry it up with an onion!
he suggested


back home
before i tossed it in the fridge
i feared the smells of freshly milked ejaculate or worse
a sweaty crotch
there was only one way to know better
i sheepishly convinced myself that i should get testy
i opened the clear plastic bag
and sniffed at the sheep's testis...

...luckily i was wrong
the smell was not unpleasant
it was much like the smell of turkey ham or ricotta
you can make out something fresh and cold but nothing foul or distinguishable in the least

please stay tuned for part two
were i cook and eat the lamb gonad and describe it to you

tomorrow that testicle is gonna brown in hot butter and garlic!!

(and most probably then simmer in a reduction of cranberry juice, bardolino)

till tomorrow!